I AM NOT A SPECIAL NEEDS MOM – by Guest Author Sarah Frazer
The face of Adoption has changed a great deal over the past few decades. More and more adoptions are of special needs children. My hat goes off, and my heart goes out to these self-less adoptive parents of children who come to them "seemingly" broken. Welcome guest author Sarah Frazer .
The face of Adoption has changed a great deal over the past few decades. More and more adoptions are of special needs children. My hat goes off, and my heart goes out to these self-less adoptive parents of children who come to them "seemingly" broken. Welcome guest author Sarah Frazer .
I'm not a special needs mom. Or I didn't think I was until therapy
has become our normal routine. I
never thought much about her looking different until I began to notice the
quick glances at the grocery store. Eyes darting away in embarrassment as they
catch sight of the drool. Or her weak neck muscles. Or maybe its the tiny
pink braces or lack of eye contact.
She is considered different by our world's standards. Different sometimes means not good enough. When I realized she will not reach the milestones at the appropriate ages, I finally had to admit I was a mom to a special needs daughter. And a little part of me didn't like that label.
She is considered different by our world's standards. Different sometimes means not good enough. When I realized she will not reach the milestones at the appropriate ages, I finally had to admit I was a mom to a special needs daughter. And a little part of me didn't like that label.
When I began my journey of special-needs parenting, I
was scared. International adoption brings the possibility. But I honestly didn’t expect to bring home a little girl who couldn’t walk or talk. Guilt and loneliness settled in my heart. I
had so many questions, mostly about myself. Would I be enough? Could I really
do this? I didn't want to be a special needs mom. I didn't think I
wanted to walk this road. I felt pushed into the deep end.
We've all seen the stories of special-needs students getting
their moment to shine. The boy who was faithful on the football team all year,
and the coach letting the student score a touchdown during the last
game. Or the girl who was asked to prom by the popular student. The dress and
smile shine as she gets to be beautiful, even by the world's standards, for one
night.
The other players will not remember any game through
their high school career, but they will remember their teammate's joy as he
passes the end zone. The dress may not be remembered, but the smile will be. Why
do other children see these students as special and treasured? Why are those
people remembered in our lives?
Because there is beauty found in the heart. There is worthiness
found in the ordinary. The small milestones are celebrated with joyful enthusiasm.
Laughter becomes contagious. Their joy is full, and so is ours. We see
beauty in the simple.....all because of her.
“Do not
lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy
and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves
treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do
not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will
be also.
Matthew 6:19-21
Matthew 6:19-21
This year I've discovered heavenly treasure. A girl has
come alive before our very eyes. She giggles. Acts silly. Shows preferences.
Communicates. Loves big, and with risk. Cries. Tantrums. Eats. Sleeps. Watches
TinkerBell. Her worth to us goes beyond her ability.
If my daughter's ability to walk determines her worth, she is
sadly lacking.
If my daughter's ability to talk is what gives her life merit,
she is incomplete.
If my daughter's outward abilities are a reflection of her
worth, she is not enough.
But…if value is placed on her ability to feel and give
love, she measures up.
But…if worthiness is based on her soul, she is eternally
cherished.
Even if she never walks or speaks a word....she is still worthy.
Every child, even those with disabilities, will live forever. And they matter.
They are the treasures that do not rust or fade away. My daughter matters. And
she gives me hope, as a special-needs mom. Hope in the eternal. Hope in a
God who looks at the heart. The invisible things truly are more valuable than
the visible. I matter, too. My worth is not based on a character
flaw or physical limitation I might see in the mirror. My worth is not even
based on what I own or the failures or accomplishments of my life.
Even though I didn't want to be a special needs mom, and I still
find it hard, I give praise to my Father everyday for giving me this
child. I get to witness something I would have never witnessed otherwise: we
all matter to God. We are all valuable. Every soul. We are
valuable because we are precious to the Father. The Son. And the
Spirit. Precious. Wanted. Worthy because of our Creator.
ABOUT AUTHOR SARAH FRAZER:
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| Guest Author Sarah Frazer |
As a momma of four littles and wife to a busy
husband, Sarah spends her days making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches,
reheating her coffee ten times a day, and sneaking quiet time with her earbuds
to drown out the screaming. She invites you to join her as we study God's Word
in our ordinary days!
PURCHASE LINK FOR Glorious-Ordinary-Invitation-Study-Everyday
SOCIAL MEDIA LINKS FOR AUTHOR SARAH FRAZER
Gumroad: https://gumroad.com/l/ZMow
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