Thursday, June 23, 2016

Adoption from a Grandmother's Perspective by Guest, MaryAnn Diorio, PhD, MFA

My guest today is MaryAnn Diorio, and she is doing a giveaway of her book The Madonna of Pisano. Leave a blog comment below to enter the giveaway. I will choose the winner on the
Sunday following this post. 

When my daughter announced that she and her husband were planning to adopt a child, I was both delighted and concerned. Delighted because I had been looking forward to being a grandmother. Concerned because I knew nothing about adoption and had many questions. TWEET THIS

Upon doing a Google search on grandparents and adoption, I found, to my surprise, very little information. It seemed as though grandparents were not considered an integral part of the adoption process. Yet, I have since learned they are a very important part. For this reason, we need to be aware of some issues we will face as the grandparents of children who have been adopted. Here are some of those issues:

1) The New Look of Adoption. We adoptive grandparents need to understand that adoption today is much different from what it was in our day. Chief among these differences is the openness and transparency with which adoption is conducted today. TWEET THIS    

Back when I was growing up, a girl who got pregnant out of wedlock was sent away to avoid shame for herself and her family. If she chose to have her baby adopted, the adoption was conducted  privately and sometimes kept hidden from the child for his entire life.

Today, adoptive mothers often keep in close touch with the birth mothers of their children. The adopted children are told at an early age that they are adopted and are encouraged to keep open the lines of communication with their birth mothers and/or birth fathers.

2) Unexpected Questions. When my daughter shared with me some of the questions people would ask her--questions like, Where is he from?; What nationality is she?; Does she know she is adopted?--I was relieved that my daughter would be the one answering those questions. Imagine how surprised I was when people started asking me the same questions.

Because I wasn't prepared, I kept the conversation short and sweet. I then got some coaching from my daughter as to how to answer such personal questions, if at all. Sometimes people are genuinely interested; most of the time, they are just plain nosey.

3) Practical Help. Look for practical ways to help your children as they go through the challenging adoption process. For example, instead of a traditional baby shower, donate a gift of plane tickets for travel related to the adoption. Offer to babysit when you can. Cook a meal or two for your child and her family. What you can do is limited only by your creative ingenuity. TWEET THIS

Bottom line, remember this: Adoption is a gift of life. Just as God the Father has adopted us into His family and made us equal heirs to His salvation, so must we look on our adopted grandchildren as equal heirs of our love, our support, and our devotion.

Resources for Adoptive Grandparents: (My Daughter's Blog on Adoption)

Copyright 2016 by Dr. MaryAnn Diorio. All Rights Reserved.

Dr. MaryAnn Diorio writes compelling fiction about the deepest issues of the human heart. Her latest novel, The Madonna of Pisano, is the first book in her trilogy titled The Italian Chronicles. She and her husband are the proud grandparents of five adopted grandchildren. You may reach her at

Purchase Links to My Books:

Surrender to Love (A Novella)

Candle Love (Picture Book)

Toby Too Small (Picture Book)
Who Is Jesus? (Picture Book)

Don't forget to leave a blog comment to enter your name for a chance to win
The Madonna of Pisano. 

MaryAnn's Social Media Links:

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